These words came pouring out of me last week, and I decided to share them on Facebook.  The post received so much positive feedback and comments from people saying that they needed to hear this message that I’ve decided to post it here as well.


Ok kids, here’s some wisdom I have gained over my 42 years that I feel is important to share.

Do not allow a title or position you hold to become entwined with your identity. If you do, you will hold on to that position/title much longer than is healthy for you and the people affected by you holding it. You may behave in paranoid and abusive ways in order to hold on to it and do great harm to others. When you inevitably no longer hold that position or title you will suffer a severe identity crisis which can cause you great existential pain, and your behavior may lose you treasured friends and valued colleagues.

Know who you are at the core of your being. Nurture yourself and accept who you are. You are not your positions and titles. Those things are temporary and you must treat them as such. Wear them when they can help you further your True Will, but discard them when they no longer serve you, when you can no longer serve others by holding on to them. Identify and nurture others to take on those positions and titles when it is time for you to put them down, but know that giving up that position/title means giving up control. That is a good thing. You have to let it go in order to grow. The new title/position holder(s) may do things differently and have other ideas about how to serve in said position. That is ok. Different doesn’t necessarily mean that it is harmful or wrong. Regardless of how you feel about it, you will no longer be steering that ship. It does mean that you must accept that the ship you worked to keep afloat could sink or crash. It doesn’t mean that it will, but you must accept the possibility because you have to accept that you are not at the helm and that it is out of your control. All things come to an end. But that does not negate the good work you did while you were in that position or when you held that title. You did that work, and its effects have been woven into the Wyrd. That will not change regardless of what the future holds.

Know when it is time, and let go and move on with respect and grace. You are still YOU. And you can do great things in your next endeavor.